Honoring ourselves and others is an easy and powerful way to enhance our own mind, body and spiritual wellness. It is a tried and true practice that reaps the benefits of love, friendship, and closeness and who couldn’t use a little more of those wonderful treasures?
As a young person, I thought I knew what honor was, but it wasn’t until many years later that I finally understood how to honor another person. In my twenties, deep in the throes of a divorce, I started watching a taped series of seminars by Gary Smalley about marriage, it was then that I received a formal education in honor.
He explained in amazingly simple terms an example of how we use our expressions to show honor. He went on to demonstrate his theory by telling a story about a room full of people who had attended one of his seminars. He had arranged for someone to bring in a violin to show the audience. The violin did not seem to be unique in anyway, and as it was being passed around (in a case). People took the time to look at it and passed it on. The presenter began to tell a story about the violin and as people listened their expressions and reactions started to change. What they were looking at was a famous Stradivarius violin that was worth millions of dollars. They started to gasp in awe at what they were holding in their hands. They became incredibly careful with it, looking it over more carefully, like a child does when they explore something with their eyes for the first time. Gasp, awe, wonder… honor.
His message was about honoring your spouse. Not silently honoring your spouse, but how to honor your spouse in a way that they are completely aware. He went on to say that if we are able to look at our spouse, our children, our friends, colleagues and even people we just meet, the way those people looked at that violin, after finding out it’s worth, we were effectively using honor in a very appropriate, life affirming and effective way.
When someone walks into a room or in the door from being gone, you gasp with awe and excitement, letting them know you are honoring their presence in your life. You can even take it one step further and get down on one knee and express to the other person how lucky you are to have them in your life or back in your presence. You may say something like, “Oh wow! It’s you! I’m am so honored to be in your presence!”
Note: If you do this to your people in your life every day, they will think you are a complete weirdo! BUT, it induces a lot of smiles, laughter, endorphins, memories, and best of all, human connection.. deep meaningful bonds.
My second run in with this practice was when I first started practicing real estate. The principal broker that I went to work for was and is a very down to earth, small town guy. His magic was and is in how he greets/greeted everyone with a wondrous awe followed by a big exclamation mark expression. I witnessed the power of honor every time he greeted someone including when he greeted me. It worked! It drew people to him, it helped him gain their trust, their friendship, business, and loyalty. As a result of him practicing honor, integrity, and work ethic, he is a top producer in his market.
The simple little trick of using honor out loud has stayed with me since then. Not only does it feel good to practice honor, it makes the person you show honor toward feel good and valued. I have witnessed it build friendships, bring spouses closer together, harvest trust, and build business relationships and all it takes is a little effort on your part.
Next time some special walks through the door, greet them with honor. It may not work the first time (especially with an unruly teenager), but if you continue to use honor as a practice, you will see your relationships change for the better in no time.
Having the ability to gain and foster meaningful relationships is very important to a person’s overall health and wellbeing. People with larger social groups tend to live longer and have more fulfilling and healthy lives. This simple practice can add years to your life!